BAHARRUKH

It was 6.30 in the evening and i was walking on the streets of jaipur with a rucksack of not less than 15-20 kgs. It was not the physical stress that was hurting me . I was just walking after gruelling 9 hours straight out of my u.s.m.l.e. exam. Now I had to find an occupation to pass my time since I had my train scheduled at 11.45 in the night.
I heaved a big sigh when i saw Big Mac infront of me. So with all my bag and baggage i squeezed my way in to Mc Donalds. I was not that hungry cos not less than a kilo of chocolates (which i hogged during the day) were keeping my glucose levels to max but i was craving for something salty. I ordered a Chicken Mc Grill combo and some fries and snatched all the newspapers from the counter. Aim was to find some happening movie at a nearby theatre. The best these papers had to offer was "Welcome to Sajjanpur". Ha Ha Ha I would have not even given it a second thought if Shyam Benegal mentioned under director wud've not caught my eyes. Since i had a lot of time to kill i thought what the heck and with coke and fries in my hand and my massive rucksack on my back I ushered myself towards the movie theatre which to my amazement was at a stonethrow.
Took a ticket and stepped in . The movie had already started but since i was there just to rest my spine on some soft foam so din bother about the missed part. At least that was my idea untill the guard stopped me . "Sir bag khol ke dikhana padega"....."Dekh le bhai , bomb maine bag ke sabse nichey chupaya hai" .He gave me that stirred look. I smiled ; he smiled back but that did not prevent him from rummaging through my bag . Out came my chicago bulls cap, my mufti shirt , followed by my jeans and when he hit my tommy hilfiger u.g. i gave him that look and said "Bhai ab dog squad bhi bula lo, ek do pen bhi padey hain ,khol lo kahin ink ki jagah t.n.t. na ho?". "Arrey sir aap toh naraz ho rahey hain"guard said and shoved all my belongings back in to my bag.I instantly knew it was not my day . So with my backpack i entered hall and found a place with an empty seat by the side fr my bag.With my evening strting like that how on earth the movie was going to be fine. Movie was the crappiest shit Benegal had ever managed.And even more irritating than the movie was a weird guy sitting just behind me ;who was in i dont know what kind of euphoria that he would laugh the loudest hollow laughter even at somebody falling from bicycle. I needed the seat but I cud not tolerate the man. So the next time he strted his hollow laughter i retorted by laughing hysterically and louder than him.I did it again and again whenever he even opened his mouth for as much as a yawn. That did quite him .Looking at me he could not muster enough courage to show his displeasure in words cos he somehow got the msg that he wouldve been beaten in to a pulp if he tried that . So hardly 15 ..20 minutes were by and that was it ......my threshold for pathetic sajjanpur. Picked up my backpack and hit the road to railway station.
As i was asking for directions from his uncle type person on a scooter he offered me a ride, which i gladly accepted. He dropped me few hundered yards from the railway station where i spotted a dhaba and my desire to have some real indian food strted urging my insides. I hit towards the dhaba and went straight in . It was even not fit to be called a dhaba. Call it a cross between a dhaba and 'chai ki gumti'.So i heaved my back pack on that long bench."Saab dilli se aye hain?"the dhaba wallah asked ."kyun bhai main kis angle se dilli wala lagta hoon?"( I dont like delhi guys for their shallowness and superficiality so the comparison kinda irked me). "khaney mein kya hai"? " Saab 20 rupye diet. dal chawal roti sabkuch with salad" . The bottomground price made me rethink on my descision wheteher my stomach wud have to bear the toll later. but i thought since when maddy did u strt getting so delicate. " phir laga dey garma garam" i said . Splashed my face with a mug of water .I dont know whether it was my hunger or the delicacy of the food i ended up giving him a 10 rupee more after i had done with. Then sitting on the same bench i tried focussing on the sound of music coming from his ancient taperecorder. Incidently it was playing my favorite song" baawra mann dekhne chala ek sapna....."listening to it i was lost in the variety of activities going around me. As if at night also everything was alive.Poverty is vocal but Richness is often a mute. I remembered my onward journey to Jaipur in ac. Everybody was so aloof and isolated behind their respective curtains. It suddenly occured to me that i did no more want to travel in a.c. on this return journey . I'll travel sleeper class instaed, travelling with life at a more basic level. So i rushed inside the railway station and got my ac ticket cancelled and gt one in waiting in sleeper class. soon the train was on station and after talking to t.t. i hit a loer birth and i dunno when i was in deepest of slumber.
I was woken up in the morning as usual with my feets brushing against some early risers passing through the aisle.Indian railways i guess is still confident that Indian genes have not improved enough to produce human frames of 6 feets. Anyways it was a sunny morning .I arched up my neck to look out of the window. I could see a small but busy station. Some stacks of dunlop tyres at a corner, few ppl in dhoti walking with large potleys on their head ,and a banana vendor shouting ..."kaileey ,kaileey kaileeyyyyy.....". sleeper was definitely more fun than A.C.After a few momnets of tug and war of whether i shud get up or not i decided in the favour of the former.Got up and after freshning up my eyes strted searching fr some coffee wallah. Ah soon he was there. It was then when i heard Baharrukh .

Baharrukh was a 'he' cum 'she', a eunuch or hijrah..as u wud call her locally. Her charecterstic claps preceeded her so it gave all my fellow travellers ample time to hold on to their purses and dhotis.I smiled to myself and ordered an extra coffee. As soon this about 30yish slim figure wrapped in gaudy cheap yellow entered the compartment I knew I was going to be the victim. "Aye haye mere rajja ,kitna modeler sa lag raha hai (god knows wat she meant by modeler)meri jaan tujhse purey 50 loongi". I smiled "Ja tehal ke aa tere liye coffee order ki hai , laut ke aa jaldi thandi ho jayegi".She gave me that confused look and went back to other seats. After not more than a minute she was back."Bata mere rajja kya dikahun tujhey?" Baharrukh asked in the most seductive tone she could muster. I gave a hearty laugh right from the bottom of my lungs."Dikhana hai to thodi tameez dikha aur yahan aa baith mere paas, teri cofee thandi ho rahi hai ".I think i mustve scared her more than she cud've scared other people cos she obeyed me like an obedient child and came to sit besides me."Rajja tu toh bilkul herohiralall hai". I faked a frown "Ab tuney tarif ke liye muh khola toh jitney jama kiye hain paisey tuney woh bhhi cheen loonga". She sniggered."kahan ki hai tu?" I asked ."Pari hoon main , Jannat se ayi hoon". ha ha i laughed ,"sun nautanki band kar aur dhang se bol jaisey apney bhai se baat kar rahi ho" I faked displeasure again. I dont know whether it was my displeasure or the use of word bhai that turned her in to this very original and serious person.Sipping coffee she looked at me as if i was a display in some art gallery. "kahan se hai ab bata ?""Baharrukh hai mera naam ,Bareilly se hoon"..she answered . "To yahan kya kar rahi hai ?" I asked. "Padhey likhey lagtey ho lallla phir bhi aisa sawaal ?" She retorted very philosophically. I realised the foolishness in my question so to cover it up i asked "Mera matlab wahin ke aas paas kyaon nahi karti yeh kaam ?". "Wah lallla abhi bola tuney bhai samajh ke baat kar, par itna asaan samajhtey ho isey lallla.Mera bhi ek bhai hai 'Nankau' aur 3 behaney.Bahut pyar kaarti huun unsey. isiliye wahan nahin rehti , ki woh sir utha ke ji sakey.Tears swelled up in her mascara loaded eyes.I felt foolish again . "kisney kaha tu kum hai , aajkal teri biradari waley dekh election jeet rahey hain"." Lallla woh isliye kyun ki saarey neta hum jaisey ho gaye hain.....Warna jindagi ka election to hum kab sey haar gaye hain....", she heaved a deep sigh. I dont know why she was opening up infront of me like that . Maybe cos we so called normal ppl have never seen them as persons."Achcha ab chup ho ja warna baki sab samjhenge ki mainey tere saath kuch kar diya hai".I laughed tried to cheer her up". Clapping in her unique way towards the other fellow passengers she said " Lallla ek bat bataun tujhey apna samajh key.In sabki kabhi mat sochiyo. Yeh sab paidaishi darshak hain .Sirf tamasha dekhne ke alawa kuch nahin jaantey hain. Tu apney dil ki kario lallla". I smiled at her wondering how lots did she teach me in those few words. "Achcha mainey tera bahut time khoti kiya . le 20 rupye ab ja".I took a crumpled 20 rupee note out of my pocket and placed it on her hand .She gave me that peircing stare. It was such deep a look that i was frozen up for a second. "Wah lalla Behan boltey ho aur neecha bhi dikhatey ho", she took out a crisp 50 rupee note from her blouse and adding them to my 20 rupee note pressed them hard on my palm and said "lallla dekh mana na karna.Teri badi behan ne diya hai apney chotey bhai ko. Nahin lega to samajhungi ki tu bhi mujhey waisey hi dekhta hai jaisey sab dekhtey hain...aur lallla kabhi badaliyo mat , yeh jo insaan tere andar hai na , isey jinda rakhiyo , main tere liye dua mangungi" .....she stood up laughing in her original seducting tone ..."aakhir baharrukh ka bhai hai , bada toh banega hi ......chal oye seth jagah de" .....she made her way cornering another traveller. I was mesmerised ....... frozen..... , just satring at my open palms , thinking how pale my 20 rupee note looked besides her crisp 50 rupee note........"

Madhur Uniyal ( It is not a story i fabricated.Every word of it is true)